Sunday, January 31, 2010

Kelly McGillis

So the other day, I was packing up all my stuff to move, and while I was doing that I had movies playing that I'd seen many times and didn't have to pay close attention to. One of those movies is The House on Carroll Street (1988) which is a film that I just love to death. It's sort of noir-esque but at the same not blatantly dark or bleak, and the love story is, in my opinion, perfectly done.

I've seen this movie a lot of times now, and never before did I think Kelly McGillis was very cute in it. This time, I thought she was really attractive.


I suppose it's because her character in the film is determined, capable, and strong, but I knew that about her character in times that I watched the film before. It's a little frightening and frustrating to think that my taste in women is changing, even if I'm getting more into women with more substance, which is, I suppose, a good thing. I keep feeling like I need the opportunity to play the field more. My last girlfriend, Lauren, was my first in years, and it's been almost a year before our not-even-two-month relationship came to a close, and I haven't dated anyone since (and it's NOT for lack of trying).

It's like, now I'm able to see the more substantial qualities in a woman like Kelly McGillis but I never got the opportunity to fool around with less substantial women in order to grow in my attraction. Or am I just becoming more desperate? Would I still be attracted to a woman who lacked substance? Does McGillis really have any substance? I mean, her character does, but she could be ditsy as they come for all I know.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Cute Girl In A Hurry

A cute girl just rushed into the library computer lab, quickly walked around the room looking for a free computer, and then rushed back out. She probably had to check her e-mail real quick before class or something.

Ulka Agarwal, M.D.

So the new psychiatrist that just started at the Cal State East Bay clinic is named Ulka Agarwal. As I mentioned a second ago, the meds I've been on haven't been kicking in quite like I'd like them too, and I made an appointment to see her to explore my options.

She's so adorable. She's really cute and spunky and a good listener and she looks like she's probably a huge dork. She kind of reminded me of Tina Fay a little bit.

The only thing was, I don't think she really liked me. Usually therapists etc. like me right off the bat, because I'm sincere and have a unique, endearing outlook on life. Dr. Agarwal didn't seem that impressed. Oh well.

Joanna Robinson

So I was visiting the campus clinic to see the new psychiatrist, because I was concerned that my meds weren't working, since I'm still having really bad problems with depression. While I was in the waiting room, I flipped through the October/November 2009 issue of SmallBiz, which had this really pretty woman named Joanna Robinson on the cover. She apparently owns a (legitimate) massage parlor that is novel in that it does quickie massages where clients leave their clothes on. Joanna, if you're reading this, I'm trying really hard not to make your business
sound dirty.


Wednesday, January 27, 2010


I think they're cute. I like this video.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Squirrel Girl

So earlier today, I was on campus doing some campus-ly duties, and I saw a young woman with a beaming smile, excitedly chasing a squirrel around a tree, trying to get a photograph of it. It was so, so adorable.

While I did title this post Squirrel Girl, it is important to note that this is NOT who the woman above described was. Squirrel Girl does rule though.


Second Cigarette Lit

So with this post I'm trying to make a really long story short. Here we go.

On Saturday, January 23rd, my amazing friend Nicole invited me to go out to the Hella Gay dance party at The Uptown in Oakland, claiming that this would be an opportunity for me to meet women. While perhaps on the surface, this advice sounds counter-intuitive, it was at least worth a shot.

Fulfilling my dork disposition to a T, I showed up about half an hour before Nicole and her posse did. I felt uncomfortable and depressed, so I decided to take a stroll, and wound up at the Quarter Pound Giant Burger on Telegraph, where I ordered some freedom fries (That later gave be food poisoning. I give the joint a big thumbs down.). While I was waiting for the food, a homeless girl began digging through the trash can in front of the building, found a cigarette, and proceeded to ask if anyone had a light. I enthusiastically offered her my fire, and she popped the already been smoked cigarette into her mouth and puffed away.

The kicker was, she was actually really cute.

Also, I saw a not-bad looking girl wandering around the club like she had shown up alone and was too introverted to enjoy herself, and I invited her to dance with me and my friends. She politely declined. Also, I tried dancing with this smoking hot girl who was a pretty good dancer to boot. She pretended like she didn't see me.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Robots In Disguise

Robots In Disguise are one of my favorite electroclash bands out there. I think they look really cool in this video, and I'm sure they're really cool people who it would be a pleasure to get to know in real life.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Cute Girl Headed For The Restroom

I just saw a cute girl with one of those neat little army caps walking into the bathroom.

The reason I'm posting so much today is because I have a doctor's appointment at one o'clock today and I left the house at a quarter after nine because I knew that if I didn't do that I'd fall asleep and not wake up until three in the afternoon. That's how life is when you're unemployed.


So I found this on my flashdrive just now, and I want to post it here, because I want the world to know what a pathetic bastard I am.


This is a get well soon card that I drew for some girl that I don't even know that I met when she was posting naked pictures of herself on 7chan. We exchanged emails and we chatted it up a few times. She sounded perfect, but she lived all the way out in Savannah, Georgia. She broke her wrist skateboarding (!) and I made her this card. She's hugging a hammerhead shark in the picture, because she told me once that she loved all kinds of animals, so much that she would hug a shark if given the chance. She hasn't emailed me back since about the end of November. I'm a little heartbroken.

Cindy Sherman

I don't know much about photography. I was just checking out some of Cindy Sherman's stuff, and not only does she sound like a totally, totally badass woman, but she's not bad looking.


"The work is what it is and hopefully it’s seen as feminist work, or feminist-advised work, but I’m not going to go around espousing theoretical bullshit about feminist stuff." - Cindy Sherman

Cute Girls in the Library

I spy two cute girls in the library here at CSU East Bay. One is wearing a puffy jacket and a cute fluffy hat and is eating a granola bar. The other is wearing a smart looking purple coat and has really geeky looking glasses and is working on a computer with about four other people.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

To Chuck Damage, Thanks For Everything, Saturn's Cafe

So the other day, I was in Santa Cruz getting some help from my brother on this Whiskerino picture. I had to go to Kinko's while I was there, and at the Kinko's I found a card for a digital camera. I'm at my Aunt and Uncle's house right now, and their computer has a thing on it where you can plug a camera card directly into the computer. So I checked out what was on the card. There's a bunch of pictures from Saturn's Cafe, which was right next to the Kinko's that I was in. Saturn's is sort of an alternative place, with a fully vegetarian menu and a punk rock staff. So to that end, there were a few pictures of cute girls on the disk. I realize that it's sort of creepy to be posting pictures of girls that I found online, but so what?








I'm pretty sure I've been served by the woman in the last picture. I remember because my friend Ariel told me I didn't tip well enough.

Also, I'll give back the camera card the next time I'm in the Cruz. I'm not a monster.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Lighter Trick Success

So about a week or two ago, I started carrying a cigarette lighter sot hat I could light cigarettes for the girls I might run across. Last night, my plan came to fruition.

I was making a midnight run to the Dangerousway, and as I was leaving two tough, scary ass looking gangsta women began to approach me. I was a little apprehensive, but it turned out that the just wanted to borrow a lighter. Bingo. Both those women probably secretly have a huge crush on me now.

I don't think I could date a gangsta though. That's the point where drama becomes dangerous.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Tactical Corsets

I remembered something else. Last Sunday, at a vegan potluck that my friends put on every Sunday I was talking to this cat about out websites. I told him I do a website about girls I like, and that I'm very proud of it. He told me he has a website called, and I assumed it was a silly name for a website that didn't have anything to do with what the website actually did. Turns out I was wrong.


He gave me his business card, which had a different woman wearing a battle corset I asked him if that was his wife. He jokingly replied 'Yes, I marry all my models.' I said 'Well, you're a regular Fela Kuti.' and some people got it but most didn't.

Dedicated readers might remember, Crissy Belle. Her OKCupid profile said she liked Fela Kuti. I thought that was really cool. I am attracted to women who listen to Fela Kuti.

A Woman At A House Show

I forgot about something that happened last Friday. I was at a house show seeing this band from Providence, RI. I don't remember their name, but there were this really artsy fartsy noise project. The girl in the band took off all her clothes and painted her butt and got on all fours and put candles on her butt. I wasn't really feeling either her or the band, but I was in the same room as a naked woman, and I figured that would be appropriate for this blog.

Carmen Who Works At Whole Foods

I was checked out by a cute girl named Carmen at Whole Foods today.


So I've been part of a beard competition and today, I got to meet a fellow beard grower, Ali and his wife, Rachel. Not really a woman that I like like, but I like Rachel as a friend, and they bought me a burrito and they were really nice and fun to hang out with. So there you are.

Martha Quinn

Last night, I watched Problem Child 2 (1991) and Martha Quinn had a minor roll as a desperate divorcee who made cupcakes. Man, she's really good looking. Like seriously, I think she's the best looking former VJ that I know of.


Affluent San Francisco Girls

Last Friday, I went to San Francisco for the first time since I went to see Melt-Banana in October. I kind of forgot how there's a lot of really attractive women who ride the BART and are affluent pseudo-hipsters. There was one who I wanted to draw a picture of this one who was smiling and talking and eating an apple. She had long dark hair and glasses and a v-neck sweater. I might still draw her and post it here. I want y'all readers to see how cute she was. Keep in mind, I'm an amazing artist, so don't freak out when you see how good I am.

The Woman Who Works at Favorite Indian

As the name would imply Favorite Indian is my favorite Indian food restaurant. I went to eat there twice in the last week, and both times I was assisted by a beautiful woman who wore a pantsuit. I hope her partner appreciates her. Unless she's kind of a butthead, and then I hope she doesn't have a partner and she's really upset about it. Buttheads deserve to be upset.

The Women Who Worked With Fulci

So I mentioned in a previous post that Italian exploitation films of the 70's and 80's featured many beautiful women and that they were often trashy. Honestly, I'm not sure that the women are really as trashy as one might expect. I watched Zombie (aka Zombi 2) (1979) and City of the Living Dead (1980) this past week and honestly, the women of those films are pretty good looking in a way that's not discernibly trashy. My favorite girl part of Zombie was when the woman wears nothing but a swimsuit bottom and scuba gear and swam with a zombie fighting a shark. I don't know why, but I was kind of taken back by seeing a topless woman. I was like 'Woah! I thought I wouldn't really think that was that awesome, but I was totally all about it.'

This was also a good part.

So sorry I said y'all were trashy, Italian female actors of exploitation films. I take it back.

Let's play catch up.

I'm kicking it at my brother's house in Santa Cruz. This is the first time I've had a fair bit of Internet access in sort of a while. I'm going to go ahead and post about every girl experience I've had since the last post, in chronological order, tonight. Let's get started.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Catriona MacColl

I was watching The Beyond (1981) last night, and the main protagonist of the film is played by Catriona MacColl. I was surprised at how cute she was. Literally, I sat up in my chair a bit, because her being cute was completely out of left field.


And I don't know why I was so shocked. Italian exploration films of the 70's and 80's thrived on, among other things, using sex to sell their movies. Perhaps that's precisely why I was so shocked though. MacColl has kind of an unassuming, girl next door look, as opposed to the typical look they go for in Italian exploitation films, which is oversexualized, gigantic pillow breasts, type women. MacColl has a nice look. I like nice women.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

I have always throught Chelsea Clinton was hot.

Even before I knew how much being romantically involved with her would piss off my parents, I thought she would be a cool person to get romantically involved with.


Sunday, January 10, 2010

Cigarette Lighter— A Tool For Approaching

I've started carrying a small cigarette lighter with me when I go out, in the hopes that I can provide a light for any cute girls who need one. This guy I know told me last night that it was a good tactic, and I found out later that he used to be a pimp, so it's reasonable to think that he knows a fair bit about how to woo women.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Hey, remember me?

It's been a while because I didn't pay my phone bill and they took away my Internet. Sorry.

So I was at the salon getting my hair cut the other day, and the hairdresser bumped into my elbow a little bit with her big soft belly, and a spark of serotonin went off in my brain. To that end, I conclude that it has been far to long since I've known the caress of a woman.